I don't know quite where to begin.....
I hadn't paid much attention to my computer yesterday. Since it was Memorial Day, Mr. Bee and I had spent the day at home with Miss Emma Bee just doing stuff as a family. Nothing special or in particular. Mr. Bee and Emma Bee went for a walk while mommy cleaned a bit around the house. We played on the swing set in the back yard, we snuggled and sang one of Emma Bee's favorite songs, took a trip to the store together to get a few things and just enjoyed each other's company.
I got a call from my mom at about 11pm last night. She was calling to let me know that Penelope Davis had passed away that afternoon. I didn't know quite what to say. I knew Penelope had not been doing well after her surgery. But this I didn't expect. My mom figured I probably didn't know because if I had, I would have called her to tell her. My mom couldn't sleep last night so she just happened to check Penelope's page for an update and found the worst update she could have imagined.
I cant find the right words to describe how I feel. Honestly.....I don't consider myself to be good with words. So I guess I will just say the words as they come. I sat for a minute after my mom called....thinking. Thinking about Penelope. Thinking about Shannon and Ben and Penelope's 2 brothers. I thought mostly about Penelope and her momma. I thought about my Emma Bee and me. And then I went upstairs into my baby's room, picked her up from her crib and rocked her while she snored on my chest and I cried. I rocked my baby and cried for about an hour. This is unfair. Its just unbearably unfair. How does this happen? Why does this happen?
If you don't know about Penelope Davis.......
She was a beautiful little Princess who just turned one year old this past February. And in January, she was diagnosed with stage 4 Neuroblastoma. Cancer......a monster. A few days ago Princess Penelope underwent a surgery to remove a tumor in her tummy. The surgery was just too much for her tiny body and poor sweet Penelope went into kidney failure. She passed yesterday afternoon at about 3:30pm.
So like I said...... this just isn't fair! It isn't right! There are murders and pedophiles and rapists walking the streets with not a care in the world and nothing ailing them. But sweet, innocent, precious babies are suffering from cancer and dying. It doesn't make sense to me. It shatters my heart.
Penelope was beautiful. Just beautiful.
When I would see pictures of this sweet baby, all I could see was a friend for Em. A sweet little girl that I could easily see my daughter being best friends with, having over for play dates and slumber parties, playing house with and playing on the swing set with. I saw Penelope and I thought of Em. I saw Shannon and the way she loved her daughter and I knew exactly what that love feels like and I thought of how much I love Em. I couldn't imagine what it would feel like to be the momma of a baby with cancer. I couldn't imagine how heartbroken Shannon is feeling. I still cant imagine. I don't know how anyone can survive such a terrible loss. Having your baby girl taken from you at such a young age after such a short time on this earth...... I just cant imagine. And it crushes me knowing how many mommies out there have to experience this agonizing heartbreak each and every day. I know Daddies experiences this too. But I'm a mommy and I know because Ive felt it. There's a different kind of love and bond between a mommy and her baby. Especially her baby girl.
My heart is breaking for the Davis family and I wish I could take their heartache away
I'm sure things will be difficult for the Davis family for quite some time. Actually, I know things will just never be the same. The pain of losing Penelope will weigh heavy on their hearts. And the financial burdens will be hard to bare as well. I have shared Penelope's fundraising page on GiveForward before and Id like to take a moment to share it with you again and encourage anyone reading this to consider making a donation to help Shannon, Ben and their two sons. There will be funeral costs, not to mention medical bills remaining from Penelope's surgery and cancer treatments. The last thing this family needs after losing Penelope, is to have to worry about struggling financially. Even if its a small donation, every little bit helps.
And because funeral costs are now suddenly upon the family,
direct donations can also be made to the Davis family by sending a Paypal donation to Sdavis227@yahoo.com
Be sure to mark this on your Paypal donation as sending funds to "friends and family" so that they are not charged any Paypal fees and 100% of the funds can go towards Penelope's final expenses and the needs of the family.
Always keep Penelope in your hearts! This little girl has touched so many lives in such a short amount of time. She was only on this earth for 15 months but changed so many lives. She battled cancer and inspired many and brought awareness to childhood cancer. Shes touched our hearts for sure.
Last night, after I put my baby back in her crib, I took a walk. Mr. Bee had fallen asleep on the living room floor. I just needed to get out of the house and get some fresh air. So I walked up and down our street for about an hour, barefoot. Just thinking about a million different things. Thinking about Penelope and her family. I thought about my baby and how blessed I am. And I noticed something. I notice how beautiful the night was. It was so still. It was about 2:00 in the morning. We live close to a busy street and even at 2am, there are usually still sounds of cars and people going by. But not last night. There wasn't a sound. There wasn't even a breeze. Our wind chimes on our porch were still and quiet and the leaves on our trees were still and silent. I have never noticed a night as silent and still as this. I looked up and saw the sky was clear and the stars were brighter than ever. It was breathtaking. I stood on the corner of our street, under the street light....in silence.
It felt as if the night had taken a moment of silence
to honor sweet Penelope.
to honor sweet Penelope.
Penelope Davis passed away on Memorial Day 2014.
Memorial Day is a day of remembrance.
And we will always remember Penelope on this day.